While having lunch with two long-time friends this week, a funny thing happened… A lady leaned over from the next table to politely interrupt us. “I just had to tell you,” She said with a shy smile. “I’ve been eavesdropping on your conversation, and I don’t know how you all do it.”
Thank you so much for your honest reflections in this essay. I am the mom of an almost three-year-old, and while there is so much that has been delightful and surprisingly fun about these first few years of my daughter's life, I also feel like older kids may "fit" with my strengths, interests, and passions more closely. It was refreshing to hear you express this idea in such a straightforward way, because it isn't something I've encountered in parenting circles so far. In particular, I have often felt like I can't relate to other parents lamenting how fast their kids are growing up--not because I don't feel my own pangs of wistfulness, but overall, I'm more excited about what's to come than I am grieving what we're leaving behind. There's so much I'm looking forward to experiencing or learning as my daughter grows up, and I don't want to cling to the baby years as being the highlight of my parenting journey--but it's so often framed that way in conversation and in popular culture. Thank you for sharing your own experience, which is helping me put language (and give myself permission) to admit this isn't really my favorite stage of parenting, while still recognizing my strengths and interests as a parent and a person.
Oh Sarah, I am so glad you found this piece and that you feel better. I struggled for years with the sense that there was something wrong with me for not loving the baby years, and it was an enormous relief to find that I have grown to enjoy parenting more and more as the years have gone on. It feels so much better to embrace who we really are vs who we think we "should" be. ❤️
Thank you so much for your honest reflections in this essay. I am the mom of an almost three-year-old, and while there is so much that has been delightful and surprisingly fun about these first few years of my daughter's life, I also feel like older kids may "fit" with my strengths, interests, and passions more closely. It was refreshing to hear you express this idea in such a straightforward way, because it isn't something I've encountered in parenting circles so far. In particular, I have often felt like I can't relate to other parents lamenting how fast their kids are growing up--not because I don't feel my own pangs of wistfulness, but overall, I'm more excited about what's to come than I am grieving what we're leaving behind. There's so much I'm looking forward to experiencing or learning as my daughter grows up, and I don't want to cling to the baby years as being the highlight of my parenting journey--but it's so often framed that way in conversation and in popular culture. Thank you for sharing your own experience, which is helping me put language (and give myself permission) to admit this isn't really my favorite stage of parenting, while still recognizing my strengths and interests as a parent and a person.
Oh Sarah, I am so glad you found this piece and that you feel better. I struggled for years with the sense that there was something wrong with me for not loving the baby years, and it was an enormous relief to find that I have grown to enjoy parenting more and more as the years have gone on. It feels so much better to embrace who we really are vs who we think we "should" be. ❤️