It is a truth universally acknowledged that “adulting” can often feel like a grind, and consequently, I’m always looking for little ways to inject more fun and joy into everyday life.
Wearing bright clothes and socks works, and I know many women swear by red lipstick as a pick-me-up. Retail therapy and vacations are great, but my favorite mood enhancers don’t cost a thing, and many have benefits proven by science!
Below are my top ten. I’d love to know what you would add to this list: let me know in the Comments!


1. Break an arbitrary rule. As a former “good girl,” I follow many completely arbitrary rules, like “I may only read books for pleasure at bedtime” and “I must empty my e-mail inbox every day.” Inspired by Lindsey Stanberry’s joyful morning routine (she eats a cookie and watches a TV show in bed!), I’ve been giving myself tiny jolts of joy by noticing and breaking silly rules, like doing my Peloton workout in my pajamas instead of workout clothes, working from bed instead of a desk, having popcorn for dinner when I’m not particularly hungry, and drinking water out of a wine glass.
2. Take micro breaks. I love this advice from Laurie Santos, a cognitive scientist and happiness expert at Yale University:
“There’s lots of work on what’s called time affluence, the subjective sense that you have some free time. The simple act of giving myself a break — two to five minutes to catch my breath between tasks — makes me feel less time-famished. Studies would suggest that just changing that sense of time famine can have a disproportionate impact on well-being.”


3. Fire up a fun group chat. One of the few things I like about cell phones is the ability to set up and participate in group texts with friends and family. When a text chain is really hopping, with a flurry of jokes, advice, pictures, observations, or commiserations, I feel like I’m hanging out with my favorite people, even when friends and family are far away. The names of certain group texts also make me chuckle: my favorites refer to trips I’ve taken (or are looking forward to) and other memorable events, like “Cairns Here We Come,” with my high school friends (named for a wedding we attended years ago); “Bahamas Mamas and Papas,” our upcoming spring break vacation crew, and “The 10 Adults at the Beach,” which includes my in-laws and refers to our annual extended family trip.
4. Revisit a beloved book. Last year, during a dreaded reading rut, I re-read the Narnia series, my childhood favorites, from start to finish. Revisiting those old friends made me feel comforted and cozy and helped me through the long, cold winter. I agree with author Elizabeth Goudge, who said,
“In times of storm and tempest, of indecision and desolation, a book already known and loved makes better reading than something new and untried...nothing is so warming and companionable.”
My other favorite rereads are anything by Laurie Colwin, especially Happy All the Time and Family Happiness; Crossing to Safety by Wallace Stegner, and Eligible by Curtis Sittenfeld.


5. Watch birds. I mostly work from our breakfast room table, which is not an ideal workspace in any way except that it gives me a great view of our bird bath. Watching birds frolic and splash fills me with delight, and now I know why: bird watching has been proven to increase happiness. A recent study found that seeing or hearing birds improves well-being for up to eight hours!
6. Use your hands to make (or do) something. The positive benefits to our emotional health of playing an instrument and making art are well understood, and researchers are studying the theory that working with our hands is good for our brains. Having something to show for our efforts is immensely satisfying, and I use this strategy when I immerse myself in a complicated, hands-on recipe or spend time tidying up a chaotic corner of our house. Knitting, gardening, and coloring all improve memory and attention and reduce anxiety and depression.
7. Peruse old pictures. When my husband, Jim, traveled constantly for work, he often sent me videos or photos of our kids doing adorable things. When I questioned the meaning of these random photo dumps, Jim explained that when he felt lonely on airplanes or in hotels, looking through our family pictures and videos made him feel happy. Because most of us take pictures of good times we want to remember, scrolling through old photos and recalling those feelings is a fast fix for feeling happier in the present. Our gallery wall has the same effect: I can’t walk past it without spending a few moments reliving fond memories.
8. Give compliments. Recently, as I exited a store and walked to my car, a stranger called out, “I love your purse!” I turned to him in surprise, and we exchanged brief pleasantries. After saying goodbye and getting into my car, I couldn’t stop smiling. The next time I went to that store, I remembered that small moment and felt happy all over again. That one quick comment had an outsized and lasting impact on my mood, and while we never know when we’ll receive a random compliment, studies show that giving compliments feels just as good as receiving them!


9. Turn on happy tunes. It’s well established that listening to music can make us feel happier, and studies have proven it can also reduce blood pressure, heart rate, and anxiety. I have several feel-good playlists that I use as pick-me-ups: Good Feeling 70s, Party In Your Living Room, Feelin’ Good, Upbeat Cocktail Jazz; and this one, which works wonders when my teenaged daughter is moody!
10. Retrain your brain. I have long been a fan of mantras and positive affirmations. As a child in an unhappy home, I found solace in phrases I pinned to my bedroom wall. These days, to bolster myself, I write these three sentences in my journal each morning: “I am loved; I am worthy; I know what I want.” Brain imaging has proven that positive affirmations work to replace negative thoughts (and their related feelings), and other studies show that they can improve academic performance and make people more open to behavior change. When I’m going through a particularly hard time, I silently repeat a Loving-Kindness Meditation, which calms me (and has many proven benefits): “May I be safe; may I be happy; may I be healthy; may I live with ease.” This is also a powerful practice to promote kindness and generosity toward other people. To do so, replace “I” with someone else’s name.
To offset the onslaught of unsettling headlines, bills to pay, deadlines, and obligations I’d prefer to ignore that regularly populate my email Inbox, I subscribe to several newsletters that function as happy surprises. Here are my favorites. Each time one of these arrives, I click and open gleefully!
5 things to be Cheerful About: a colorful and inspiring Monday morning missive from Sophie Hansen, a beloved Australian food writer, farmer, and cookbook author.
Platonic Love: I especially adore their addictively clickable Monday culture and shopping recommendations.
The Performance Plan: Hilarious and poignant slice-of-life dispatches that make me laugh, cry, and snort a bit, too!
What To Read If: timely weekly book recommendations for every mood and occasion, from romance to nonfiction, that go beyond current releases and bestsellers.
Breakfast Club: Follow along as 30-something American Maddie Burton attends baking school in Paris. Ooh la la!
Handpicked: Delightful weekly links and fabulous finds from an artist and busy mom of four.
Café Anne: NYC-based journalist Anne Kadet takes readers on wild and wonderful adventures around the city—from riding the subway all night to investigating $1 pizza slices.
Time Travel Kitchen: Delightful nostalgia and delicious recipes from a Chicago-based writer with many stories to tell...
Big Salad: Heartfelt life advice and tips on fashion, dating, motherhood, marriage, and friendship from inspiring (and stylish!) women.
Living Inside a Movie… A happiness hack that evinces a surprising amount of joy on a regular basis for zero, or next-to-zero, dollars!
The Secret to Deepening Friendships. 7 things I've learned (number 3 might be controversial!).
Sounds Like Teen Spirit. My kids are both officially teenagers, and the thing that surprises me the most about this is…I don’t hate it!
🌴 I will be on vacation next week!
There won’t be a free Friday issue, but Paid Subscribers will receive this month’s Culture and Entertainment Recommendations! Click here if you’d like to upgrade your subscription: paid subscribers receive the gift e-book 28 Books That Will Change Your Life, exclusive monthly entertainment recommendations, plus other fun goodies!
🏅 Contest Winners!
Congratulations to Meredith, Rachel, and Jackie, who each won a copy of Emily Ley’s The Simplified Cookbook. Here are their mealtime hacks from last week’s issue (and check out the Comments for more!):
Meredith: “My favorite mealtime hack is the mouli (one of those fancy cheese grinders they use for parm at Italian restaurants)! It’s our most-used appliance - and it makes such a difference to have freshly grated cheese. Plus, a block of cheese stays good longer than pre-grated cheese! Another favorite hack is freezing cookie dough in balls and baking them in the toaster oven whenever a cookie craving hits!!”
Rachel: “Breakfast for dinner, always! Whether it's scrambled eggs and toast or we go all out with french toast and home fries, it's always easy and always a hit!”
Jackie: “Baked salmon is quick, simple and so easy my 11 year old usually makes it (it's his favorite). He adds salt, pepper, brown sugar and a little olive oil and bakes at 400 for about 13-15 min depending on how thick. We usually have it with rice and a green vegetable of some sort. I recently had my mind blown when I realized my rice cooker has a delay function, meaning I could set it to start up to 12 hours later so the rice is ready when we get home. NEVER knew this!”
❤️ Thank you for reading! xo Amelia
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I’ve never read the Narnia series and have always wanted to. I even *OWN* a full box set. Might be time to crack it open. 🙃
The way I *gasped* when I read “drinking water out of a wine glass”!